A Letter to My Little One

To my precious little one,

  We haven't met yet. But in my prayers, I talk to God about you every day. I pray for the little person you will grow to become and for the precious woman who is carrying you right now- in her arms or in her tummy.

  I don't know if you will come to me as a newborn, a 6 month old, or a toddler. But what I do know is that the moment I meet you, I will love you with all of my heart.

  My little one, you are a chosen baby. Your daddy and I prayed many months about making the decision to choose you. We still aren't finished with all of the classes and paperwork to be able to meet you, but that will go by quickly. And soon, I will be rocking you in our comfy rocking chair.

  Your daddy is so excited to meet you. He is brand new to this whole baby thing (I work with them almost every day) so he is practicing. He practices wrapping my baby dolls so that one day he can swaddle you warm and tight. He holds little babies at church so one day he can hold you and comfort you in his big, strong arms. Your daddy prays for you every day...and is already so in love with you.

 

  And I am already head over heels in love with you! As a nurse who works with babies all the time, I get to hold, feed, swaddle, and comfort many other peoples' babies, but I can't wait for the day when I can do all of those things for my baby- you! I can't wait to take you for walks, read you bedtime stories, and sing sweet lullabies to you as you fall asleep in my arms. You are a gift from God and will always hold a special place in my heart.

  My dear, sweet little one. Your room is ready, our hearts are growing with anticipation to meet you and love you, and we can't wait to see what God is going to do in and through you, our chosen baby. We will continue to pray daily for you and patiently wait until the day we meet.

I love you.

Love,
 Your Mommy

Asking for Directions

I know that they say guys have a hard time asking for directions. But let's face it ladies, we do too!

 

I hate looking like I don't know where I am going, what I am doing, etc. To the point where I will spend hours trying to figure it out before finally asking for help. Or how about doing a task...all by yourself! I am guilty of that one all the time!

 

I don't like to ask for help. I am a first born. I can DO IT MYSELF!! If there is a financial need, well, I'll just work more hours. If there is a physical need, well, I will just devote all my time and energy until the need is met. I got this!!

 

However, there are some things...okay, a lot of things, I just can't do by myself.

 

For example. There are some lovely bushes that grow along the front of our house. They are great for privacy and keeping others from peeking in to our little backyard. However, they grow like weeds. The first year in our home, I took the hedge clippers to them and gave them a good trim. Only to realize 3 days later they were filled with poison ivy, hence, the terrible rash all over my arms!

"I'll be more careful next time." I thought as I took the clippers to them again the next summer. Once again, 3 days later, I was covered in a rash. Only this time it was so bad, I was placed on steroids.

 

Now, you'd think I would have learned my lesson. Naw, I did it again. And was placed on steroids, again! Talk about a stubborn will! You know why I kept doing it? Because I wanted everything to be done just the way it should be. I wanted everything to look nice. I wanted to show my husband I could do it ALL BY MYSELF! Unfortunately, all I showed my sweet husband was a stubborn wife who couldn't learn her lesson! This year, though, I've stayed away from the bushes. Yep, they are a little long right now and yes, they will eventually get done. But I am going rash free this summer! My husband is perfectly happy to trim the hedges too because he doesn't get poison ivy and it keeps me from being a cranky wife for 2 weeks! Sometimes, we just need to ask for help!

 

Going through this adoption journey has humbled me in more ways than one. And one of those areas is asking for help. Like I have stated before, the adoption journey is not a cheap journey. Even though God has blessed us unbelievably financially, there are still some things that we just can't pay for on our own. So, we have come up with a fundraiser and would love to have you join!

 

The "Missing Piece" Fundraiser



  Dave and I have stated from the beginning that this journey through adoption is our adventure to find our "missing piece." And this sparked an idea! We turned the picture above into an 88 piece puzzle! But, here's the fun part! If you would like to help us financially and help make a difference for a little girl or boy, you get to receive a piece of this puzzle! When you choose to be a part of this fundraiser, you will be sent a puzzle piece along with a letter. Once you have received the puzzle piece, you will sign the back of your puzzle piece and send it, along with your donation, back to us. When we have all the pieces back, we will put the puzzle together and frame it as a gift to our adopted child! This puzzle will have all the names of those who helped make it possible for this child to have joy and hope for the future!

 

 

As much as I'd like to say, "I can do this myself," I can't. We can't. Adoption takes a village. Thank you to those who have already so graciously given- your name is already on a puzzle piece!! For those that would like to give, please send me your name and address to adoptingbw@gmail.com

and I will get a puzzle piece to you!

 

Thank you all for joining us on this journey! Knowing you are reading the blog and praying for us is the biggest blessing of all! We couldn't do this journey without you guys!!



The Uphill Climb

When we were little, we used to go hiking all the time.

I had the privilege of growing up in the Pacific Northwest and got to climb Mount Rainier...all the time!! I never knew how blessed I was to climb that amazing mountain until I moved to a place with hills for mountain ranges!

One thing we always did while hiking was encourage one another. Up the hill, down the hill, under the tree, over the rock- we were always cheering one another on. There were times we thought we weren't going to make it up the hill and crawling on hands and knees, we would cheer each other on  all the way to the top.

That's how this past week of our adoption has been. An uphill climb.

And so many encouraging us as we climb.

Right now, we are in the stage of a home inspection and interviews...which haven't actually started yet due to a fork in the road.

A week and a half ago, we got a call about a baby.

A baby that needed a home.

A baby that was due in 4 weeks.

Dave and I assessed the situation, felt comfortable with the outcomes, and said YES!!

We knew there would be peaks and valleys on this journey, but we never knew the magnitude of them. We were on an emotional high! We had to get a profile together in about 48 hours...24 of which I was working! For those of you that have adopted and put together a profile, this thing is no joke! Pictures, testimonials, stories- basically, an 8 page snapshot into our life!

We completed the profile. We were given the accolades of our social worker as she applauded our very nice looking profile in such a short period of time. We prayed and waited as Monday came and our profile would be shown to this expectant mom.

We waited and prayed.

We prayed and waited.

And today marked one week...of waiting and praying.

And then, we got the news...we had not been chosen.

In the midst of the highs and lows, peaks and valleys, of this past week, today's final answer found both Dave and I in a place of calm. The kind of calm that comes from knowing that everything is okay and that everything happens for a reason.

I never knew this kind of emotion existed. The elation of the possibility of being a mom in 4 weeks, the stress and patience of waiting for an answer, and the weight in a simple word of "no"- the possibility is gone. It is a kind of feeling that is going to be hard to go through again as we continue on this adoption journey.

The hike up the hill was real. The encouragement from our friends and loved ones was amazing, and we made it to the top. We conquered this mountain!

Now, we trek on to Baby Care classes, Infant CPR, and a thorough investigation of our home! Can't wait to see what other mountains there are to climb!

Faith Like Potatoes

Tonight was our Friday night. We hadn't had a "Pizza and Movie" night in a very long time and since I am going into a long weekend of work, we decided to turn Thursday night into a Friday night.

We had a nice, hot pizza and "Interstellar" from the library all ready to go. It was time for dinner and a movie with my sweetheart!

But, let me back up a little bit.

Early this morning, Dave and I went on a walk and were discussing ways we could raise funds for this adoption. We were told by the administrative assistant taking care of our many pieces of paperwork that we were going very quickly through this process and she was very impressed! Kudos to us....I guess! HA! However, because the process is going so quickly, the financial part of this adoption is beginning to become daunting. And Dave and I are fixers. We are planners. We are go-getters. So, the first thing we want to do is figure out a plan to fix the situation we are in and go after it! Makes sense, right?! It did to us this morning as we were planning and planning.

Now, back to tonight.

As Dave put the DVD in the DVD player, we settled onto the couch and waited for the movie to play. It wouldn't play. Dave took it out and placed it back in. We waited. It still wouldn't play. After several tries, we gave up and went to Netflix. We finally settled on a movie (that can be very hard for two firstborns!) and a message popped up saying too many users were on and we couldn't watch our show. Tried two more times. Same message. Bummer.

Then, Dave suggested we watch a movie called, "Faith Like Potatoes," a video my sister had given me for Christmas. Sure, why not. So, he opened up the movie and it began right away. "Faith Like Potatoes" is based on a the true story of Angus Buchan who was a Scottish farmer living in Africa. He was a hard working man with a short temper. He worked hard ALL the time and whenever an obstacle got in his way, he made sure whatever it was got fixed and life went on...at the loss of friendships and almost at the cost of his marriage. On the brink of desperation, he met Jesus, began a relationship with Him, and he was a new man. He began telling others about Jesus and watched as miracle after miracle happened in his village.

The worst drought of his time hit and the whole town was living in fear and desperation. Without rain, these farmers livelihoods were gone. But, Angus prayed. He trusted. He remained confident in the God of the universe that He would provide for him and his family. He planted potatoes. Now, if you know anything about planting potatoes, they especially need water. His neighbors thought he was crazy. But he trusted in a God who was in control of all things. And on the day of harvest, in the most severe drought, he had an entire crop of potatoes. Because potatoes grow underground, he had no idea what would be there until the day of the harvest. God provided. God gave them potatoes.

As the credits rolled, my eyes filled with tears. I couldn't speak. God was telling me to have faith. God was telling me to trust that He is and will produce an incredible harvest at the right time. God was telling me that He is in control and that He will never fail me. God was telling me that this adoption adventure is my time of faith; my time to trust and watch as God does miraculous things! What an incredible message!

This adoption adventure isn't just about bringing another person into our home. It is about growing the relationship that Dave and I have with God and about the relationship that Dave and I have with each other! I am so excited to see what other lessons God has to teach me on this journey of adoption!

Oh, and once we finished "Faith Like Potatoes," our other movie, "Interstellar," started right up.....